Every “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” Halloween Heist Episode Ranked From “Noice” To “Hot Damn!”

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A bad Halloween Heist episode? Sorry, that doesn’t exist.

It’s that time of year again, y’all! You know, when you rewatch every Halloween Heist episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine and plan out exactly how you’d win the highly coveted ultimate human/genius title for yourself.

As your friendly neighborhood Brooklyn Nine-Nine fan, I decided to go back and rank all seven Halloween Heist episodes we’ve seen so far from a casual “noice” all the way to “Hot damn!” Without further ado, here’s how it all played out:

7. “Halloween II” (Season 2, Episode 4)

Fox

I’d like to formally start this off by saying that a bad Halloween Heist episode simply does not exist. They’re all great, this one included. The gang rallying behind Holt to prank Jake really gives me an instant boost of serotonin. However, this is only the second heist episode of the whole series and the stakes — and chaos — only go up from here.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

6. “Halloween IV” (Season 4, Episode 5)

Fox

Listen, I really don’t think we spend enough time talking about how good this heist was. First of all, the team-ups are incredible. Rosa and Amy? Jake and Gina? Holt and Boyle? Perfect. This episode showed us just how clever Gina really is and gave us the iconic “Gina Knows Best” sweater. In the grand scheme of Halloween Heists, though, wilder things have happened.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

5. “Cinco De Mayo” (Season 6, Episode 16)

NBC

I can summarize this whole episode in one word: chaos. The stakes? Consider them raised. This was definitely the most over-the-top heist so far. I mean, Terry faked a whole explosion just to push it back to Cinco De Mayo! Overall, this episode was a fun change of pace from the rest of the season, but it didn’t contribute to the overall storyline of the show or the characters as significantly as some of the other heists have.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

4. “Halloween III” (Season 3, Episode 5)

Fox

There’s nothing better than an underdog arc, and this episode gives us just that. Jake and Holt were team captains for this year’s heist, and neither wanted to pick Amy because they thought she’d be a traitor to the other team. So, Amy showed them who’s boss and outsmarted them both. It’s what she deserves, truly. I’m also giving this episode bonus points for Gina’s iconic “If I die, turn my tweets into a book” line.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

3. “Halloween” (Season 1, Episode 6)

Fox

This is the first Halloween Heist episode, and it’s no doubt a classic. It’s only the sixth episode of the whole series, and one of the first times we get to see the whole gang working together like this. Amy learns to love Halloween! Jake and the crew show Holt exactly what they’re capable of! TBH, no complaints here.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

2. “Valloweaster” (Season 7, Episode 11)

NBC

This episode is *chef’s kiss*. Rosa’s heist win was a long time coming, and it certainly did not disappoint. You’d think that after six Halloween Heists, the stakes couldn’t get any higher than they already were, right? WRONG. In this most recent heist episode, Rosa outsmarted every single person not once, not twice, but THREE WHOLE TIMES, Y’ALL. We stan a queen.

You can stream this episode on Hulu.

1. “HalloVeen” (Season 5, Episode 4)

Fox

Sorry, but this is the only correct answer as to which Halloween Heist episode is undeniably the best. HALLOVEEN 👏🏼HAS 👏🏼 IT 👏🏼 ALL👏🏼! The cold open is perfect. Jake’s proposal to Amy is perfect. And of course, it gave us Holt’s absolute gem of a quote, “You’re not Cheddar, you’re just some common bitch.” 10/10 stars. Will be watching on repeat for forever, probably.

You can stream this episode on Peacock or Hulu.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna spend the rest of spooky season the right way and binge these all over again.

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